020411

WHAT SHOULD I DO ?
WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO DO , WITH ALL THESE BLUES ?
HAUNTING ME , EVERY WHERE , NO MATTER WHAT I DO .
WATCHING THE CANDLES FLAKE AROUND , IN THE EVENING GLOW , I CANT LET GO .
WHEN WILL THE NIGHT BE OVER ?

I DIDNT MEAN TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU .

230111

2011
what year is this .
im turning 21 soon .
and i can feel that im so old .
omg .

last friday went out with zj , bk and zp .
drove to amk to watch movie .
and we watch the 2am show . omg . couple seat somemore .
tsk tsk . sit till back pain .

had much fun .
but fuking pissed off with zp .

he really makes me wanna kill him .
not fair .
u say that we make your next appt late ?
than u should tell us first hand .
and , u are also late when meeting us .
than ? our fault ar ?
this is not being fair to bk . who is always the first to reach in every meet ups .

that is the reason y i post that on fb .

051210

it should be grace birthday today .

happy birthday girl .
i miss you lots .
turning one year older , which makes us more mature , and our friendship one year older.


kinda sad today , got to know something happen between those guys .
perhaps you are right , i shouldnt know it .
but , im in the middle of this group , is there anything which i cannot know ?
if im the one being keep in the dark , i would be very miserable .
i don noe what happen infront and what happen behind , and just got to know that both are not gonna talk to each other ?

and now , here comes the truth which i don know if i can believe it or not .
but i really hope its a miscommunication only .
i wish , pray and hope that those harsh words you have said is only in a fit of anger and you DON MEAN IT .
cos it really broke my heart .

i bear with it till i finally get home .
i cried ,
i think ,
i tried .

its great that you step back , put down ur pride and apologise .
this is wat i like .
u think of us .

i don wan all my efforts during these years to gone down the drain .
what you said might be correct , he is too self centered .
but without him , would we be so happy now ?

seriously i don blame you . its not ur fault .
both of you are just victims .
you are angry is becos he jus called and scold for nothing .
you are angry cos you think its he the one who forcing him to stay .
the fault lies with the planner .
and the planner didnt even tell who is coming and jus call call call .


anyway , what happened has already happened . we know each other for so long already .
guys , don be angry anymore . its not worth it .
ur are just breaking my heart more , when i need the most support from .
a lesson to learn , a step to got to noe us more better . and to let us see a clearer picture of who we are , what are we made of , and what we should do .

seriously im scared .
becos other than the 8 of us ,
i don noe how i can walk the road down together with .
i cry not becos im sad .
becos ur are angry for nothing which makes u all stubborn and don wanna see a clearer picture .
i cry is becos i wan u all back .
IM NOT THE TYPE WHICH I PUT FEELINGS EASILY INTO A FRIENDSHIP .


i don hope that u all will see this blog post .
i don hope that u all will come and tok to me about this matter anymore .
i jus wanna see us back together , happily going out together .
blocking other ppl way together , and slacking together .

that's our pattern right B.O.W ?

200910

the 228th post .

congrates on turning 20 koong . =)

die ar , my hair keep dropping . zZz .

i jus wan you by my side ,

to ship this friend island forever . =)

110410

i saw the loneliness in ur face ,
the sadness ,
with ur tears .

wat can i do in order not to make things worse ?
the previous one was years ago ,
and it came back again .
y ? as a family we should be in harmony ,
not agony .

i tried to tok to the other party ,
but still .
stubborn .
let things jus go ..
cos im really tired .

pointless to say anymore .

050210

come on baby ,
today chatted with grace on msn .
and yea , im happy .
i wanted to tok more ..
but boss beside me .. @.@

anyway , so damn fucking suay today .
kana fine . $500
still waiting for the letter to come .
shall see how it goes again .

arhs .
i miss grace wong .
she said that she's calling me 6.30
but till now no answer .
msg her oso no reply .
think she's in sch now ba ..

aww . i miss schooling with u . =)

100110

happy birthday papa .
i may not be a good daughter in ur eyes .
today's ur b-day and yet i ..
u let me see how ur workplace celebrate ur bday with u .
they specially made a video for u and upload in FB .
and wat did i do ?
jus a happy birthday papa to u personally .
im sorry .
but i jus couldnt bring myself to do that .
im sorry papa .













im going for poly .
and i don noe what course to choose .
still considering .
i wan to find a course that really can keeps me going ...




grace ,
i noe that u are still sad about that thing .
u didnt mention it and i knew .
i knew u are feeling heartache too .
alone in overseas is not a good thing afterall .
im sorry for the hurt i caused .
anyway , no amount of sorry could make up the hurt .
we always speak louder than words .
ya , i know .
but ..






anyway , i jus hope nothing happens to u overseas .
im glad that u gave me a call that nite .
im really happy .
although u sound low ..
but at least u called .
im really happy already .


attachement finishing soon .
which means my weekends gonna be back at work again .
but im sure this is something i can choose .


this year .
i jus hope everyone around me is happy and fine .
and my family to get back once more .
i don wan this complicated feeling .
my heart is made of blood and flesh ,
and i have feelings too .

LOVE FAMILY AND BOW